I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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