What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Randomize
