So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
There r osticjed everywhere
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize
