took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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