I wannas sexs uuuuu
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize