its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
