I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
