i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Randomize
