we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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