you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
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