In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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