I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
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