Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
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