Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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