I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
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