What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
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