I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
