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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  no, didnt close...

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.

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• (240): View more from Maryland

  We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.

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• 

  25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (317): View more from Indiana

  I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."

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• (714): View more from California

  Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.

  (1-714): View more from California

  This is why we're friends.

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".

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• 

  25 Things All Men Can Definitely Agree On

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (480): View more from Arizona

  You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it

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• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.

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• (818): View more from California

  Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.

  Fav 1 123 73

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• (540): View more from Virginia

  You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?

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• (416): View more from Toronto

  I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.

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