I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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