So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
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i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
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Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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