Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Randomize
