I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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