I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Randomize
