you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
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If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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