she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
