shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Randomize