i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
