yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
