5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
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i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
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May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
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