3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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