do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
She bit a glass in half.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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