Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
My ass is underappreciated
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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