That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
