The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Randomize
