your parents love me but you hate me
i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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