So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize