is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
