Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
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Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
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Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
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