We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
