All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
