sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Randomize
