sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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