Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
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