on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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