I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
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