she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize
