I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
This is my gift to your gina
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Randomize
