Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
