you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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