Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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