I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
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The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
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We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.